This is like a full on “serenity now, serenity now” moment for me.

Yes I’m late to the game on this reveal, traveling for work will do that to a guy, but I can’t ignore the shoe above.  Yes boys and girls that is the Air Jordan 2013 aka XX8 and no Virginia… apparently there isn’t a Santa because if there was he wouldn’t allow us to have that atrocity represent the Jordan line.  Look I get it, you have reached a point where the shoe will sell on the Jordan name alone and by positioning it as the cutting edge tech shoe each year you can sell it for well in excess of $200 and make some cash (rumored to be over $300 with the special Nike + functionality, also known as the $70 stupid tax that Nike has been tacking on to their signature shoes) but why oh why does it have to come at the cost of design?

Seriously, look at that thing.  I know it was “inspired” by stealth but does stealth really mean a $300 shroud for my foot?  It’s almost the absence of design when its zipped up and when zipped down…is that really a look?  Inspired by lazy people who don’t lace their shoes or something?  And why oh why is the first colorway black and alien green?  What is so terribly wrong with sticking to the classics?  And an 8 inch high top which doesn’t actually offer any support but instead “integrates the shoe with the athlete for a visually distinct look”.  Hey alot of things are visually distinct…it doesn’t mean they are good…

I guess I should at least share what it is that makes this shoe so gosh dern special at least…

  • Zoom units in the forefoot and heel
  • Dynamic fit technology uses straps and laces together for support that moves with the foot
  • Flight plate technology uses a Pebax tm moderator plate that maximizes the responsiveness of the zoom units through compression and deflection for optimal performance.

If you understood that last bullet point…congrats you must be a member of the Jordan marketing group…sounds like a glorified catapult system to me.